A little more time

Both boys are asleep, so I made a deal with Jim that I'd rub his shoulders for him when I get back if I could slip down to the lobby and post something to the the blog. The things I do for you people! :)
To back up and recap, we left Beijing and flew to Hangzhou, a 2 hr flight, Saturday night EST. by the time we checked in and situated, it was time to grab a bite to eat. Our hotel is located directly across from the biggest department store I've ever seen. Think Macy's on steroids. It has restaurants, a grocery section, housewares, clothing, makeup....it goes on and on. The only draw back is that you have to cross the street to get to it. But the drivers here seem much saner than the ones in Beijing!
We left this morning to drive to the civil affairs bureau to meet Jude. There were two other families there, one Chinese American family with a 7 year old son, from Berkley, CA, adopting a 3 year old little girl, and a couple from PA, adopting another 3 year old little girl who is for the same orphanage as Jude.
The CA couple received their child first, and she was a complete poker face. Never cracked a smile and never cried. The big brother was so sweet, manning the camera, handing her suckers and blowing bubbles for her.
The PA couple was next, and their little girl wasn't happy, but she was holding it together until the orphanage director brought Jude in. He was sniffing, and had these big, sad tears coming down his face. The little girl took one look at him and lost it. She shrieked the rest of the time, bless her heart.
A nanny had come with both the kiddos, and when the orphanage director introduced us and said Jude would come with us, he said he wanted to go home with "that mommy", the nanny, not me. I totally sympathized! Owen gave him a sucker, and Jim handed him his phone, and that helped a lot. He was able to just block it all out, as he needed to.
He has periodically cried those slow, drippy tears that just kill me, they are so resigned. But he shows tremendous resilience, it amazes me. Our guide told him it was Jim's bday and he sang "happy birthday" in Chinese to him. As he ate his dinner, he offered Jim a piece of his prized sweet and sour pork, "bc it is your bday". He later placed a (much smaller) piece on my plate, for which I thanked him. :)
I messed up ordering Owen something he would like the night before, so I tried really hard to pick something he would like, but let me tell you, this ain't Liu's Garden, folks. I had something in Beijing called fried beef and noodles that was Lo Mein-ish, and I liked it, so last night I ordered "fried meet with noodles" here in Hangzhou, and I kid you not, it was Knox gelatin with ground beef. It actually had a good flavor, but I couldn't get past the texture. Bleh. The noodle was made out of bean? I like bean fine, but not bean that looks and acts like clear jell-o. Oh, and they had no forks, so can you see me trying to eat jell-o wi chop sticks? Good thing I didn't want to eat it!
Ayway, I ordered Owen sweet and sour pork, no rice. Our guide asked Jude what he wanted and he said "meat, with some noodles" but they don't have noodles here, apparently? And when quizzed as to what kind of meet, he said "any but especially fat meat!" So our guide ordered him a dish of bacon and asparagus, with white rice. He ate the bacon, then confiscated Owen's sweet and sour pork! Owen about lost it, because we wouldn't order him another plate of pork, but e situation was salvaged as we quickly made it a buffet, of Jim and my plates as well. So now we have not one, but two kiddos, who don't eat off sir own plates!
Owen has assumed responsibility for pushing Jude around, with the exception being crossing the street, when an adult takes over. I remind Owen that when he's tired I'll do it, but he says "no, I've got it!" Jude even told him thank you for pushing him.
One wants to play with Jude so bad he can't stand it. He's made an In-your-face nuisance of himself from the first minute, but Jude handles it well. He doesn't engage in play with Owen often or long but he tolerates him, and shared a puzzle he brought with him from the orphanage.
Contrary to what the orphanage says, Jude says he goes to bed at 8pm, gets up at 6am, and the nanny wakes all the children up once at night to go pee. I've got my alarm set for MN to wake him to pee, but I don't know if I really will. I'm willing to risk a wet bed, if he can sleep through the dark....things are so much worse in the dark, don't you think?
Jude goes to the potty by himself, and he brushes his teeth by himself. He pulls himself up to the counter to brush , then does an impressive chin up to spit in the sink. He can't turn the water off though, bc he needs both hands for the chin up. This kid's resourcefulness is mind-blowing. He takes a shower by himself, he just needs help with his balance, standing. I'm thinking we'll try the tub once home. Is hotel doesn't have a tub.
We had to go take a passport-type photo of Jim, Jude and I to take to the registration of adoption tomorrow. The whole time we were there, the lady who ran the shop talked in Chinese to our guide. Then our guide turned to us, and said that the woman said we "we're nice people, nicer than 99.9% of Chinese because the Chinese wouldn't adopt a child with Jude's handicap". She said this in front of Jude, who speaks Chinese. I couldn't think of a thing to say, but my heart just broke, again, for my boy. Where do you start, trying to fill in the holes and gaps?
At bedtime. Jude broke down with some pretty heavy, but quiet crying. He wanted to call his "momma", the nanny at the orphanage. We said sure, and our guide called. The nanny spoke for no more than 2 minutes, and the crying dwindled to sniffles, then they said bye. I got out pjs and underwear that we had brought, and asked iur guide if hed take a shower. He told our guide that he only takes a shower every other day, washing only his feet on off days, but today was the day for a shower, so he was ok with it. The guide asked if he wanted Jim or me to help. He chose Jim. He tolerates me, but he seems to genuinely like Jim. It's all good, cause Jim goes back to work the Monday we get back. My turn is coming!:)
The people here stare at Jude, but he seems oblivious. I don't mean get caught staring and glance away type of stare, but gawk and rubber neck and not move out of our way to stare at his legs type of staring. Not everyone, but at half a dozen, in a 10 minute walk. It's sort of surreal.
Owen shows no interest in Jude's legs, nor does he cut him any slack for them. We played keep-the-Balloon-off-the-ground, which Jude shows possible spiker for volley ball team skills, and Owen showed no mercy, nor did Jude act like he expected any. Owen likes to wheel Jude around, but I don't think it's bc he thinks Jude is an invalid. He just likes driving him.
After Jim helped jude with a shower(I was right on the money with my underwear size selection, but might have undershot the shorts/pants size. He's a solid 4T, and I got 3T shorts. He might be able to wear the shorts, but the pants I bought will be too short.), I helped Owen get his shower. I rubbed Owen with lotion on his arms and legs in front of Jude, then held up my hands to Jude. He sat up and held his arms out, then pulled his pants up and let me do his legs. It was EXACTLY like counting your new born baby's fingers and toes for the first time. He is PERFECT. Every inch of him.
The language thing is killing me. I wish I spoke Chinese, but I honestly just couldn't squeeze anything else on my plate over these past couple of years. Anyway, I need to get back upstairs in case he wakes up....and I owe Jim a shoulder rub! Hope these other pics load. We go to finalize the Chinese adoption and file for a passport Tomorrow, then kill time until the passport is ready. We fly to Guangzhou on Friday. I'll try to keep posting, but this wifi in the lobby thing is a drag.